The Nitty-Gritty and The Beauty Beneath It All

Leone turns four weeks old this week, but it seems ages ago that she was born.  I still haven't taken her newborn pictures to send out with the announcements but it's on my "To Do" list.  Life with a newborn moves at a different pace so I'm just now getting around to posting about her birth.  Here's how it happened:

That Morning
I went into labor on Wednesday July 18th.  Spencer was home from work for a dentist appointment and then his internship with Salt Lake City in the afternoon.  So we spent the morning running errands and just enjoying a little break from the daily grind.  I hadn't slept well the night before and woke up early that morning so Spencer and I had an early slow start to our day, eating breakfast together and wandering around the house and just talking.  Looking back I should have realized something was up when I put my shoes on for the day and they actually fit. While Spencer was at the dentist I went to the store which is where I started feeling contractions.  They were minor, nothing I hadn't felt before during my pregnancy when I had been walking for a long time, so I hardly noticed.  After the dentist we went to the bank where I felt some stronger contractions. I was able to remain pleasant and carry on a conversation but there was no ignoring these.  Then we headed home for lunch during which I still felt some strong contractions occasionally but I wasn't trying to figure out if they had any regularity I honestly thought it was just from being up and about and they would pass after I took a nap.

That Afternoon
Spencer left for his internship after lunch (around 1:00 p.m.) and I tried to settle in for a nap but I couldn't get comfortable.  I ended up moving from my bed to the couch and then to the living room floor trying to find some relief but it wasn't happening.  I jumped online to check my email and instant messaged my sister Kellee. By now my contractions were more frequent and some more painful than others. I had no other tell-tale signs of labor other than contractions so I was sure I was experiencing Braxton-Hicks but it's hard to tell without timing. Kellee suspected I might be in labor but neither of us really knew.  After talking with Kellee I decided to take a bath to shave my legs for my doctor appointment tomorrow. The bath seemed to help with the pain but once I was out the contractions came back full force.  I started kneeling on all fours because Leone was facing in the wrong direction and my doctor mentioned I should spend some time on all fours to see if we could get her to turn around.  I also learned in my birthing class that being on hands and knees helps to relieve contraction pain. It helped for a while but then I needed something else because it seemed my contractions were increasing in intensity.  I tried walking, squatting, and sitting in cobbler pose (sitting on the floor with the bottom of your feet together).  Each helped in turn but nothing was getting rid of these contractions.  I went back to my hands and knees but when a contraction came I started rocking forward and backward and that is what seemed to help the most. Eventually I grew tired of supporting myself on my hands and knees and rocking so I tried to lay down.  I was still so tired from not sleeping well the night before and was desperate for a nap but lying down was the most painful position I'd tried yet.  So back to the floor on hands and knees for me.  I still wasn't convinced I was in labor (I don't know what I was waiting for because it seems so obvious now...).

That Evening
Finally, after what seemed like hours...oh, wait, it was hours...Spencer came home (around 6:00 p.m.) In the mean time I had spoken with my sister, shaved my legs, read an entire magazine, transferred phone numbers from my old phone to my new phone, and did other little things around the house all on my hands and knees. My knees were sore with rug burn from crawling around and I was so hungry but hadn't put any thought into dinner nor did I feel like cooking.  I was determined to wash our sheets that night so I insisted we go to Spencer's parents' house to do laundry.  Spencer protested suggesting we stay home since I might be in labor.  I wouldn't hear it, I wanted clean sheets. So we went to his parents' and had dinner with them, started a load of laundry.  I don't know how I managed to make it through dinner.  I was definitely in pain but I was able to concentrate through the not-so-bad contractions and excused myself to the restroom if it was unbearable.  Spencer and I headed to the basement and started a movie but I was back to hands and knees and made Spencer start timing the contractions to see how far apart they were.  We only made it through about 30-40 minutes of the movie before we decided to go home where I would be more comfortable.  We left our unfinished laundry and couldn't get home fast enough (in my opinion).
Once we were home (around 8:00 or 9:00 p.m.) I tried the tub again.  Spencer was timing and recording the contractions on paper to see if there was a steady pattern.  We called labor and delivery once to ask them some questions.  They said I could come in and they would check me but I would probably be fine at home for a while too.  I continued to find relief rocking forward and backward on my hands and knees.  While I was doing that Spencer was gathering all of the hospital gear, changed his clothes, did some dishes, and offered comfort and support.  He was sure I was in labor...somehow I was still unconvinced.  (I think I was afraid of getting my hopes up just to go to the hospital and have them send me home).  All the while Spencer would ask if I want to go to the hospital and by this point I was so busy focusing on making it through the next contraction that I couldn't really decide.  Around 11:30 p.m. Spencer made the executive decision and told me we are going to the hospital.  Riding in the car was one of the hardest parts of being in labor--all you can do is sit there and that was the last thing I wanted to do.

The Hospital
When we arrived we expected to fill out some paperwork and then be assigned to a bed in triage (a waiting area with hospital beds so they can check to see if you're really in labor before officially admitting you).  We walked in and had just a few forms to sign (Spencer did that) and some questions to answer (basics like address confirmation, birthdays...I tried but Spencer ended up doing that too) but instead of going to triage they put us in a room right away (did I really look that bad??).  We had a wonderful nurse who was attentive and supportive without hoovering.  She had another patient down the hall so she came in and out throughout the evening.  It was exciting to be in the hospital but the entire time I was wondering how long it was going to take.  Once I was admitted (around midnight) they checked my dilation and I was already at 5.5 cm (just over halfway there)!  I think Spencer and I were both surprised and relieved that I had made it that far at home and that it shouldn't be too much longer.  We learned that my doctor wouldn't be able to attend my birth but the on call doctor from the same office would deliver.  That was a little nerve racking but at the same time I didn't care who pulled her out as long as she came out. Spencer was so patient and helpful.  I used the tub at the hospital for a bit but I continued to find relief on all fours rocking forward and backward.  I tried the birthing ball and that helped on the occasions they had to monitor the baby.  I had one moment of weakness.  I was so tired and my contractions were so strong (during the 'transition' phase of labor) that I asked for a narcotic to help take the edge off.  My sweet nurse looked at me apologetically and said "You're already dilated to 8cm, it's too late.  We could hook you up to an epidural."  I declined.  At least I was already at 8cm. I'm actually glad it worked out that way.

The Delivery
Remember that other patient my nurse was working with?  We soon learned that the other woman and myself were basically neck and neck in our delivery always measuring a centimeter or half a centimeter apart.  When I heard that I prayed our baby would come first. I was delivering naturally and was sure I couldn't survive waiting for someone with an epidural to push if her baby ended up coming first (epidurals tends to prolong labor).  Then my nurse said "Let's see where you're at because my other patient was at 8.5 cm last I checked so let's see if you've progressed."  The next thing she said  was "Oh!" and then called the doctor and another nurse to the room.  It turned out that my amniotic sac was coming through (still unbroken).  It was time to deliver!! (Yet another testimony the Lord answers prayers)  The doctor arrived and broke the sac to make room for the baby (I felt ten times better after that).  Then it was time to push (4:30 a.m.).  I found that pushing is actually satisfying rather than painful.  It's hard work but I just kept thinking that with every push we were closer to meeting our baby.  We quickly discovered Leone was still facing the wrong direction (her face was toward my front rather than my back) and even though the doctor had tried two or three times to manually turn her she kept turning back (stubborn from the start).  Leone arrived at 5:34 a.m. of July 19, 2012 weighing 7lbs 8oz and 19 3/4 in long and a strong set of lungs.  She has beautiful long fingers and almond shaped eyes.  She has her daddy's hands, feet, arms, legs, and dark hair.  She's lovely.  All of a sudden I wasn't as tired as I had been.  I felt incredible!  Triumphant! Relieved that Leone had arrived safely and as close to planned as we had control over.  I did end up with a third degree tear but she was finally here (amazingly I only needed Ibuprofen for the pain even though I was offered stronger medication)!  I fed her within the first hour and she took it like a pro.  This entire experience still seems so surreal.  By 7:30 a.m. I was upstairs in our recovery room waiting for Spencer and Leone to return from the nursery and my parents were on their way from Oklahoma.  I appreciated a moment to myself to quietly gather my thoughts after all the excitement.  We had Leone room-in with us the first night but sent her to the nursery for the second so we could get more rest before leaving the hospital.  Overall we had a great experience and couldn't have asked for a smoother birth. (Remember that other patient my delivery nurse was working with?  While we were in the elevator my nurse confided that the other woman had arrived at the hospital a few hours before me and was still delivering as I was being taken to my recovery room....bless her heart).  My parents stayed for just over a week to help and they were such a blessing.  I was spoiled while they were here.  Spencer and I are so grateful for their thoughtfulness and time.  I wouldn't have survived that first week without them (I almost didn't make it through the second...--that's what cellphones are for).

Afterthoughts
The first two weeks were tough.  We learned Leone has a dairy sensitivity which means I can't have any cow product (No milk. huh?  No cheese or butter or sour cream. really?  No ice cream/fro-yo. WHAT?!).  We've learned the hard way that Leone has acid reflux and dairy can agitate her condition.  She's finally on a medication that reduces the amount of acid in her stomach and we've seen a change like night and day.  She's been a puzzle we are putting together one piece at a time but it's getting better every day.
Thoughts on labor and delivery:

• If you desire to deliver naturally I recommend taking a natural birth class.
• If you want to breastfeed I recommend taking a breast feeding class.
• I now understand why someone would want an epidural but educate yourself and weigh the pros and cons.  After delivery I was satisfied with having delivered at least once naturally and thought an epidural didn't sound like such a bad route after all.  Now that I've healed and can look back with some hindsight I still say epidurals aren't a bad idea. BUT I don't think I could do it any way other than natural knowing how quickly my labor and delivery progressed, how quickly I've recovered, and how good I felt even a few hours after the fact.  That's not even touching the iceberg of benefits that a natural delivery offers the baby.  
• Go with the flow and try to enjoy the experience.  Labor could easily be made a miserable time if you let it but remember that every contraction means progress.